30 January 2011

Incoming!

With only a couple of days remaining until the release of the My First Dictionary book, I thought I’d give you a sneaky peek at the back cover:


Alongside words previously featured here on this very blog, the 192-page magnum opus comprises over 50% entirely new content, including vocab tests, flashcards and entries guaranteed never to appear online!

Who makes these guarantees? I DO! (Oh, and my publishing contract.) Besides, have you ever known italics to lie?

Nope.

Click here to buy, or check out your local Amazon.

25 January 2011

Insight!

Here’s a little treat for you today – a snippet from the genuine 1940s children’s dictionary that supplies the illustrations for My First Dictionary. As you can see, the original authors weren’t entirely without their own streak of black humour...


07 October 2010

Mystery!

I’d like to point loyal My First Dictionary-heads in the direction of an upcoming project by the Very Us Artists, whom you’ll remember were responsible for the brilliantly twisted Sing-Along Dictionary songs earlier this year. Again mixing music, images and suitably dark reading material, they’ve conceived a unique, immersive experience called Foreshadows: The Ghosts of Zero, which, quite frankly, I can’t wait to get my hands, eyes and ears on... and possibly some other body parts too, depending on how much I like it.

Please check it out and, if you like the sound of it as much as I do, please also consider sponsoring it, for which you can receive all sorts of intriguing goodies – the best of which, to my mind, is an official My First Sing-Along Dictionary CD & book set. Yes, you really can get your mitts on one of these rare and wonderful items! But don’t do it because I want you to. Do it because you want you to... and I just know you do!

Today's word is take

22 June 2010

Today's song is anonymous

“This Song Is Anonymous (We Do Not Know Its Name)” by ButterflyPolite.



Richard Smith’s competition-winning definition of anonymous inspired this delightful bit of bespoke pop, which could hardly be more different in tone to its creator’s previous song, “Happy Families Fade”. Parody or profundity... or a little of both? Have fun deciding, and visit the Very Us Artists song page for lyrics and insights.

16 June 2010

Today’s word is anonymous


The above definition comes courtesy of Richard, whose competition-winning suggestion gave us a delicious case of the creeps, although we couldn’t quite put our fingers on why. In other words: perfect MFD material! I can’t wait to find out how Uglifruit of the Very Us Artists will set it to music but, luckily, we’ll only have to wait a week or so before the resulting song is magically posted here... Isn’t creative genius marvellous?

Richard, please get in touch using this contact page and we’ll pop your prize in the post once the CD’s been created. For the rest of those who entered, thanks for making it so hard to choose a winner. It really wasn’t easy. I loved the cleverness of Harrod’s “Gram-Gram is delusional. She thinks she is not in the facility” (talk about thinking outside the box there!) and lostophile’s “Johnny wears a uniform. His uniform helps him catch his victims off-guard” had an understated malicious streak to be proud of.

Jack Bush gave his definition a sly double-meaning in “Scout William wants to help Mrs. Billings with her shopping. He’s going to help himself to her bakery basket”, while bee’s “Scooter puts the cat in catering” line nearly made me LOL till some PP came out (“Scooter’s catering company makes the best appetizers. His paté is the talk of the town. Scooter puts the cat in catering”).

For sheer yuck-factor, I’m not sure you’ll beat: “The kitties smell food, but Aunt Maud has not been to the fishmonger’s today. Aunt Maud has questionable personal hygiene” (thanks to Fugitive) – although swishyhair certainly tries: “Charlie helps Aunt Agatha to carry her groceries home. Soon she will be carrying Charlie’s baby. Unfortunately, Charlie is also carrying syphilis”. Finally, Miscellaneous Fugitive offered an equally droll take on the scene with: “Mrs Rout always meant to read Scouting for Boys. Lord Baden-Powell was one of her heroes and she is proud to follow his example. She may have misinterpreted his intentions”.

Thanks again to everyone who entered. If you fancy a good laugh, have a read through the Comments on both of the previous posts and check out those submitted via Facebook... It’s even more bang for your MFD buck!

07 June 2010

Reminder!



Above: The picture you need to write a My First Dictionary-style definition for. Below: The amazing, unique prize you could win if you do!



Yes, there’s only a week left to enter the competition and, no, you’re not fantasizing – that really is a one-of-a-kind CD/book set containing all the My First Sing-Along Dictionary songs featured here over the last month PLUS an entirely new bonus song to be based on the winning caption submitted by a reader.

And, yes, they are in a picnic basket – but, no, that’s not part of the prize... Suckers!



Thanks to everyone who’s entered so far. There’s still time to get an entry in if you haven’t already – or another if you’re feeling particularly inspired. Just see the previous post for full details and bear in mind that the caption has to (a) define a word, and (b) sound like it might be from a real children’s dictionary, however twisted the subtext. (And remember: subtle suggestion is often the funnier way to go – something I should probably try to learn myself...)

Thanks also to John LaSala for not only producing the aforementioned CD but taking it on a picnic-themed photo shoot for the purposes of this post. I would’ve included the shots of him actually modelling the prize, but I decided to send them in to Tyra Banks instead, in the hope that the next cycle of America’s Next Top Model will concentrate on rugged, stubbly men whose oddly alluring grimaces exude a mixture of raw masculinity and, frankly, slight derangement. (Well, it’s the only way I have a chance of making it through to the finale, anyway.)

So get scribbling! Then maybe think about entering the competition... Good luck!