Burn Baby Burn
2 weeks ago
06 May 2009
Controversy!
As you can see, yesterday's word was pretend. I'd originally posted it under the title family, as one reader (Robert) noticed. At the last minute, however, I pulled it and reworked it slightly, but Google had already cached it here. Anyway, I'd be interested to know which version you think works better... Use the poll to the right if you want to express your important opinion on this stunningly relevant issue!
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27 comments:
I'm not sure whether I can ever trust you again.
The "family" has stronger punchline, I think.
I didn't really get "family," because the presence of the policeman wasn't of obvious import to me. "Pretend" worked better because the policeman was explicitly drawn into the joke.
i cant decide! omg the pressure!!!!!!!!!!
ok lockwood pushed me to one side of the fence with that observation. i'm gonna go with 'pretend'. voting now!
I like "family"
I enjoyed both, but I think "pretend" is stronger because it includes the policeman, and he is a key part of the picture. "family" while funny, isn't as morbidly funny as "pretend."
I loved "family" when you posted it, but I failed to notice the policeman. "pretend" incorporated the policeman quite well, I think. A blending, then?
Well, it appears I'm currently within the vast minority, but indeed the family version had a subtler (begetting a stronger) punchline. I do like the addition of the sinister "It will be a little game," however.
Were it up to me, I wouldn't eliminate one or the other, but allow them to coexist: two slightly varying perspectives of the same scene.
It can be a Cinco de Mayo special.
It will be a little game.
i like the "pretend" version
Definitely "Family". Whole point of the joke is that they are pretending; so using that word is kind of a spoiler. "Family" has innuendo, which is your sense of humor is based upon. "Pretend" on the other hand, is too conspicuous.
i like pretend
I agree that pretend is too obvious but I like it way better nevertheless. :)
I prefer the family version ^^
FamilySo mote it be
I prefer Family, but it was not explicit enough, as Pretend was.
I prefer the Family one. It took me a second to figure it out, thus it was even funnier! With Pretend, I think it's too obvious and loses the comedic beat that makes Family funny. Perhaps the Police officer could be made larger or more saturated maybe, to draw more attention to it.
Family would have been the better of the two had the policeman been more prominent to better establish the context. As it stands, I think your revision is more effective.
Probably the revised one, since the 'father, a mother, a brother and two sisters' bit was slightly cumbersome.
(By the way, Google's cache will probably let the page go after a while, but I see the image is still stored here.)
I much preferred "pretend." It emphasizes, in my opinion, the fact that something subtly sinister is going on that slips past the children's cognition is quite morbidly funny. They don't understand the gravity of what they're pretending to do. To them, "pretend" is still aligned with the make-believe playtime ritual as opposed to this possible child abduction that they're caught up in.
I'd have to go with "pretend." The last line is wonderful.
I'm a little stunned that over 800 people have voted in this poll already! Thanks for all these insightful comments. They help me understand what people think "works" about My First Dictionary -- e.g. how subtle or sinister to be, whether or not to go for a punchline, etc.
Family was stronger, I think. More subtle, which made it creepier.
I like the "pretend" version better. I think it is a bit darker and I like that.
I definitely preferred the Family version also because of the subtlety.
Pretend! You can use "family" for a new one, I think.
As much as I appreciate the warm glow of a sick thought slowly coming into focus, I'll have to go with the more obvious one in this case.
"Pretend" has more comedic impact and fits the scenario better.
You'll find something really warped for "Family" I am sure.
My verification word was "warden"
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